Sunday, August 1, 2010

Tantrums... Oh Boy

Tantrums have started for real in our house.  I thought I was going to escape the tantrum phase because we had not yet experienced it, but it has been going on for 3 days now.

Oh my goodness, can my boy SCREAM!

He will tantrum over something so silly as what to have for breakfast, if you look at him and he doesn't want you to, or if he has to share ANY of his toys... even the ones he is not playing with.

We had our first public tantrum just a couple of days ago... it was horrendous.  I was mortified.  It was pay day and he had been being so good so I told him he could have a treat.  I found a shelf that had diggers and cars and he chose a digger.  When we paid for the digger however, he started screaming for the car and when I told him "No!", he lay on the floor and went crazy!  There were a few women standing by and they didn't give me the sympathetic glances I craved, but instead looked at me as if I was a bad mum.  Ollie was making himself look so spoilt, when he definitely is not.  When I tried to pick him up to put him in his pram, he struggled and kicked to get away from me.  I was MORTIFIED.

What are you supposed to do in this situation... normally I would walk away when he tantrums at home and I would ignore him, but you can't do that when your in a busy shop.  I tried telling him that I didn't like his behaviour and that he was being very silly, but nothing worked.

That night at home, Ollie showed James just what he was made of, by tantruming to the best of his ability!  I think James was a little taken aback.

I really thought we were going to be lucky enough to escape the tantrums... but the phase has arrived and it's breaking my heart to see him so frustrated and upset sometimes.

Here#s hoping it does not last too long.

10 comments:

  1. Oh wow... sorry to hear about your case. Hope yours are not going to last for long!

    Mine (going to be 17 months old in a few days) are also having tantrums... he either bangs his head on the floor or he cries when you don't let him do something or if someone took his toys... Sigh...

    I wrote a post about his head banging habit, you can read it here:
    http://www.imafulltimemummy.com/post/2010/07/25/Bens-Disturbing-Habit-of-Banging-His-Head.aspx

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  2. I ca definitel relate. My youngest has been doing crazy extreme tantrums for the past few months. The littlest things seem to upset her. Bedtime is the WORST. If she doesn't want to go to bed yet she will scream and slam around in her crib. My husband said the other night she was so worked up she made herself puke!

    The only thing you can do is try and keep calm and if you need to walk away. Even in a store you can walk away for a moment.

    For my girl it seems that being tired/hungry/dehydrated has been a big trigger.

    Good luck. At least we know this phase doesn't last forever!

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  3. Have you checked to see if he is cutting teeth? I know that mine get in a really foul mood when they have a new tooth coming in. Or an ear infection. When my oldest was younger, he had a big shift in personality and everything would set him off. I was so stressed until the doctor diagnosed him with an ear infection. Unfortunately, for the next three months, he had them constantly until he got tubes. After that, back to Happy Child! Tubes are awesome. HTH!

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  4. You did everything right; your child is just being irrational (which is a NORMAL thing at his age). I walked over mine at home and ignored them, but the public thing is a whole other level of hell Dante never talked about! All the kiddie docs say to pick them up and take them home. That works just great if you live in town, but our trip to town is a 30-45 minute drive, depending on where you want to go. Being an "old" mom, I kind of copped out and left them at a lovely place we have, The Drop Off Depot. My neighbor is co-owner, and I can call to see if there is room for them there to play with the kiddies there that day while I go shopping. They are happy, and I am happy. As they have gotten older, I will take one at a time for a "big day" with Mommy. That makes it fun for both of us, and now we have some "all girl" trips, and they usually go well too. I think that whatever works to keep your sanity and the baby's happiness is what you do. They will learn to be good shoppers when the time is right for them.

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  5. I've tried a lot a tactics to calm my daughter down during a tantrum. Putting her in time out NEVER works for me/her. I always get down to her eye level and make her look me in the eye and say "calm down, let's be nice to each other and talk about why you're upset" Of course my daughter will be 3 in Oct so it's easier to use reason with her. However, she has thrown a fit over the dumbest thing...like that I didn't throw her night-time diaper out exactly at the same time as when she was peeing on the toilet. She's a little OCD :) Luckily when I tell her "do you want to start the day yelling at each other?" she generally says no and calms down right away.

    Happy weekend!

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  6. Our tantrums have evolved into, little sassy comments... which are dealt with in a, *ahem* calm manner. :P

    I wish you soo much patience with this- oh how I don't miss those days!

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  7. oh wow, you have my sympathy. My little guy is 20 months and we're in the tantrum zone too but so far I haven't suffered a public tantrum of that calibre. Two things that work for us at home are: the raspberry monster (it's hard to yell and scream when you are getting raspberries on the tummy) and 'the trees and the bells' - my husband uses this one and takes my boy onto the patio to look at the trees and the bell we have hanging up. He calms down usually. Ignoring and time out when I'm sick of being screamed at work too ;)

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  8. Kids can be real trouble when things don't go their way.

    Some good designs there (in your latest post)

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  9. I feel your pain! I'm gong through the terrible 2's myself:( How do our little angels turn into these things we can't control and then go right back to being our perfect little angels?

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  10. BTW following from Mommy Time Out
    http://angela-mommytimeout.blogspot.com

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